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Weddings are expensive to plan at anytime, but during the current economy, it can seem downright impossible to pull off the perfect wedding. But have no fear brides, for there ARE ways to have your dream wedding without breaking the bank. Follow these foolproof tips to stay within your budget, and even save money, while planning your wedding:

Prioritize, Prioritize, Prioritize!

First things first make a list of the most important things you want for your wedding and have your fianc

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Many people who are on the dating scene turn to the online dating websites to find new friends and lovers. But that road is a hard one that can occasionally bring those with great patience - great rewards.

Beyond everything else, patience is required of anyone who is pursuing friends, lovers or mates in the real world and online. When I do the dating thing in the real world, I find several opportunities to talk to the person in whom I am interested. Then after a few meets, I pop the big question, asking for a date. Then date night comes along and it may work, and it may not, but more frequently all seems well early, only to fall apart at a later date.

Folks, online dating comes with all the same pitfalls as offline dating. You advertise yourself, you find people whom you may be interested, you try to talk it up, and then the first date comes. That first date may work and it may not.

In the end, online dating is much the same as offline dating, with a few more benefits and pitfalls thrown in to frustrate the person seeking a date.

The Differences Between The Online And Offline Experience

The biggest difference between the online and offline dating experience is a benefit that comes from it.

Benefits Of Online Dating

With online dating, you get to be introduced to people with whom you may have never had the opportunity to meet in person - usually due to different lifestyles and different locations.

With online dating, you also have the ability to sort through the profiles of hundreds or thousands of people to narrow your list to your best matches more quickly.

Shortcomings Of Online Dating

When you meet someone you like in person and you say hi, he or she will usually say hi back. For every 20 emails sent out, as few as 2 or 3 may respond back.

Some online daters have defined this as the difference between \”talkers\” and \”doers\”. Many point out that most people online only want to talk about meeting, but when it comes down to it, they will be unwilling to take the \”action\” step.

This actually happens in one of two ways. First is when you send out an email and no one ever responds. The second is when you actually set up a date, only to be stood up.

Let’s be honest about why this happens.

So many people have heard horror stories about people who have met strangers online, only to have the meet go horribly bad. Yes, the criminal element hangs out online as well as at the local mall.

Ladies fear the criminal predators, and the guys should fear the fake profile predators who are always working towards asking for money to be sent for a needed emergency expense.

The one time I ran into the fake profile predator, I should have known when she could not talk intelligently about her hometown. I knew the gig was up when she started professing her love after only a few conversations. And the gig was finally up, when this woman who supposedly made about three times as much money as myself needed help to pay for her babysitter in some far off state.

The trick to ensuring your safety is to always make your first date in a public place. That way, if things go badly on that first date, then you can seek assistance from other people if necessary. You can even ask the cashier to call the police out to help escort you to your car.

Unfortunately, many people go so far as to set up a date in a public place, but when the scheduled date time arrives, they simply do not show up. Many of the people who got stood up were good, honest people, but the person who stood them up will never be able to find that out, because they never met the person whom they agreed to meet for that first date.

Fear Is The Greatest Demotivator

When dating online, the opportunities are available for some great people to meet and get together, but too often, people let the fear of contact stand in the way of letting people come together. The fear of responding to an email is the greatest threat to the successful fulfillment of one’s relationship desires, but also the fear of actually meeting someone in person will prevent even people who have chatted online for a long time from coming together.

I am always amazed when I think back to my friend Lisa, who chatted with a guy online for more than one year, before the two of them met. And then they dated for several months when he moved to her hometown. They are still married eight years later. With so many things that could go wrong in the online dating experience, it is nice to know that there are success stories that we can share.

Individuals who are used to dating and establishing romantic relationships in a traditional way will be quite amazed that there are online couples who have been in long term, committed relationships, even on the Internet.

Being able to maintain communication for over a year by merely using a computer is a challenge in itself. One cannot deny the fact that people can easily get distracted in an interactive, online environment. There is the possibility to meet a lot of people, and it is so easy to get distracted by other things. When a couple is able to keep the fire burning for more than a year, without having met in person is considered by many a miracle.

There are countless couples that have agreed to advance their casual online dating to meeting in person. Expectedly, a lot of mixed emotions can take place. It may not be easy to meet the person whom you may know very well from long conversations, but when talking only online, it is sometimes difficult to accept that the person with whom you spoke was honest and true. Below are suggestions to help smooth that first meeting:

Be practical. The fact that both engaged in online dating activities, they should be aware of the possibilities that things may be a little different when they meet each other in person. Two things can only happen during dating online: either a lot of personal information is withheld or everything is revealed. It may be that the first meeting will become a fresh start for both. If it does then let it be. But if both have been honest all along, then it will be to the advantage of both.

Anticipate. Chatting online gives both persons no limitations or accountability. Neither person shares the same circle of friends or any close relatives, which prevents one from exercising the advantage of asking about another persons’ past. It is most likely that the “closeness” you had even when you were online may require a little bit of transition when you meet each other in person. The event may be a little awkward. This feeling can be described similar to adjusting the eyes to a new light. Both should anticipate a short period of fine-tuning and choose to work from where they left off.

Be open. Openness from both will help break the ice. Neither should pretend to be what they are not. In the end, dishonesty will cause the other to question the legitimacy of everything said in chat. Sincerity from both will spark the hope that their potential relationship can indeed be trusted to potentially lead to a more serious one, like marriage.

Lower the expectations. The worst thing that could happen is expecting too much from a virtual friend. If this happens, it will be as good as having an imaginary friend. Lowering expectations may mean that one is not being confined to the image about a person who has been consistently playing in ones mind. Not every guy can be a Brad Pitt, or every girl a Jessica Alba. Relationships work better if one will not imprison the other into ones own image. One of the factors why one would meet a person after a long time is curiosity, more so than of being in love. Another thing that can ruin a good potential relationship is instantly becoming turned-off, without giving the other person the chance of proving him or herself worthy.

No one is perfect. Never assume that the person who seemed to capture your heart online is the perfect one. Even traditional dating will not encourage thinking that the person you are dating is perfect and without flaw. If you find it hard to believe yourself perfect, then you should not expect the same from another.

Lovers, who are convinced that they have found the person for them, may find it quite difficult to accept the person they have been spending a lot of time with online. Love is risky, but it is a risk worth taking.

With an article title like this, one might assume that I am ready to tell you some extraordinary news about a new dating environment. Sure, the Internet has introduced one more way for people to meet, but does that actually change the dating scene?

Interestingly, a friend of mine met his current wife online, but not from across country, rather from across town. The two of them lived just five miles apart. Jokingly, we have talked about it from the standpoint of \”you could have met, if only you had been willing to get out more.\” But it was not that easy. Sure, in theory they probably could have met when they were out and running around, but if you talk to both and ask them the places they go and the people they know, the chances of actually having met were entirely unlikely.

He is a Baptist and she is a Catholic. He is a blue-collar worker, and she works for a dentists’ office. He goes to football games and hangs with his friends, and she used to go to the bar with the girls. Although they both lived in the same small town and graduated from the same high school, none of his friends had ever met her, and none of her friends had ever met him or his friends.

The two of them were so close, and yet so far apart from one another.

The Internet was instrumental in bringing the two together. They were introduced to one another through their respective personal profiles on dating websites. After a couple of exchanged emails, they turned first to Yahoo Chat, and then they orchestrated a personal meet for dinner at a local restaurant. I guess you can say the rest is history.

After a nine-month courtship, the two were married, and they have been married now for two years.

Lessons To Be Learned

Ah yes, I am one of the guys who write about online dating. So, I got the idea to start asking questions. I wanted to know what if anything could have impacted this hookup in a negative way. Now and again, I will ask a question and wish later that I had just kept my mouth shut. In a way, this was one of those situations, and you will see why in a minute.

Both indicated that a picture on a profile is absolutely essential. Neither was willing to talk to anyone who hid behind a computer on the Internet. Had either one not included a picture, neither would have responded to the others’ email.

Both had been doing the online dating thing for a couple years. So, both had scars from the experience.

She said that one should never lie in a profile. She said that when she chatted guys online or met them in person, she was keen to listen to everything she was told. She was looking for discrepancies between what was said in chat, in person and in the profile. She said that when she first started the online dating thing, she did not pay much attention to those things, but she later found that these little red flags were a good indication of bigger red flags that she would not want to discover later.

Both suggested one of my standard pieces of advice was completely valid. I have always said that we should get to know one another a bit better, before we start making commitments to one another.

She said that guys, who were quick to jump into a commitment, were not only nerdy, but also desperate for a good reason. He said that girls were quick to declare love or commitment usually turned out to be scammers looking to make a quick buck. He said that within days of the first declaration of love, she would always be asking for money, and she would pitch a fit if you told her no, after all she would say, the two of you shared something special.

She said there was two emails that she dreaded receiving from guys. She said any email that employed cheesy pick up lines would not be answered ever. She said that if I guy wanted her attention, he would need to give some thought to his emailed words. Second, she said that if she wanted to see a guy’s male part, she would invite him to her house for the night. She did not want to see him in an email message.

He said there was two emails that he also dreaded receiving. He did not want to hear \”I love you\” at all, nor did he want to be spoken to in a condescending way. I asked him what he perceived to be \”condescending\”. He said words like, \”sweetie\”, \”dear\” and \”honey\” were immediate turn-offs, as he perceived those women to be professionals looking to get paid for their dates.

All Went Well To This Point, And Then…

You know I am the type of person who is not easily embarrassed. The interview had been going well, and then I asked the wrong question to the wrong person. And it all changed, just like that.

I asked my friend and his wife whether they had ever got together with someone just for fun, like a one-night-stand type arrangement. Both had said yes, and then I regretted having asked the question. My friend’s wife indicated that she had one real good \”friend with benefits\”, and as a single guy, I might enjoy some of the activities they liked doing.

If I had stopped here, then everything might have been all right, but I asked what she meant.

Immediately, the alarm went off in my brain signaling too much information! I turned beet red and she laughed. And to this day, I have never lived down that moment in time.

With over 397,000 threats of violence and 288,000 physical assaults on British workers each year, loneworker health and safety is a key issue for small businesses, but one that is often overlooked at employer’s peril. The Health and Safety Executive place great emphasis on safe systems of working for loneworkers and there have been a number of prosecutions where systems were inadequate or simply non existent.

There is a plethora of technology to help monitor loneworkers but to choose the right one requires an understanding of the basic issues.

Issues and Options

When deciding on a loneworker monitoring service there are a number of issues to consider and a range of options to address those issues. Firstly any monitoring system needs to be part of an integrated health and safety plan, it is not a solution. There are two basic issues that monitoring systems aim to address:

1. Is the loneworker OK?
2. Where is the loneworker?

Manual Solutions

In a manual system the way to deal with those two issues is usually for a ‘buddy’ to periodically contact the loneworker to ask if they are OK. Some loneworker jobs (e.g. social workers visiting patients in their own homes) carry a risk of the loneworker being subject to duress (e.g. being held against their will). In these circumstances it is normal for a secret word or phrase to be established between the loneworker and the buddy that can be used by the loneworker to covertly inform the buddy that they are under duress. Pre-planned procedures are then set in action.

Where contact can’t be made with the loneworker it is important to know where they are likely to be so that a search can be initiated. This is usually managed by the loneworker leaving a list of appointments, updating it if required by phoning in to the buddy. In an ideal situation, as the loneworker goes from one appointment to another she will update her latest location so as to narrow down the field of search further.

This manual system in principal provides a good risk management solution to the majority of loneworker health and safety issues.

The problem with this manual solution however is that it is time consuming and prone to failure as busy employees (loneworkers and buddies) forget to make those important phone calls.

Technology solutions

Technology has stepped in to automate parts of this process.

Well being

Most systems ‘monitor’ wellbeing by providing the loneworker with some form of alert button which they can press if they have a problem. This is usually provided in a separate item of equipment carried by the loneworker. These systems were principally designed for use in hospital settings and the like where there is a serious risk of attack or threatening behaviour and where security staff are close at hand and can be summoned very quickly. In these circumstances the system provides a good solution.

The use of these systems for true loneworker monitoring is however questionable. The system requires the user to indicate that there is a problem. If the user is able to press an alert button to raise an alarm then they are equally able to press a speed dial on a mobile phone, through to a buddy or even the emergency services. The additional complications of the loneworker having to carry a separate item of equipment, make sure it is charged and working OK make these types of system unsuitable for the majority of loneworkers.

In order to overcome the issue of a loneworker being unable to summon help in this way (e.g. because of a heart attack), some dedicated systems monitor movement or orientation (is the loneworker lying down) to infer that a problem exists. These systems do not always detect problems (e.g. a heart attack whilst strapped into a car seat) and by their nature are prone to false alarms. In addition protection is lost if the equipment is out of reach of the mobile phone network or an aggressor has broken or switched off the device.

Active monitoring systems emulate the manual buddy system but automate it so as to free up employee time and more importantly eliminates the risk of forgotten calls. Such systems need to have a truly covert means by which the user can indicate a duress situation and should alert buddies if the mobile is switched off or outside of network range.

Location

There are two common technology solutions to the question of the loneworker’s location. The most accurate solution is the use of GPS (Global Positioning System). The second option is the use of Location Based Services (LBS) provided by the main mobile phone companies. Whilst GPS is now available on some phones there is limited ability for a third party to be able to receive location data without the intervention of the loneworker.

Most GPS based systems therefore use a dedicated item of equipment and use the GSM (mobile phone network) to transmit location.

Systems which utilise the loneworker’s standard mobile phone make use of the LBS system.

The accuracy of GPS is generally better than LBS but it tends to fail inside large buildings or even in streets where there are a lot of high buildings. LBS is quite accurate in densely populated areas and works well even inside most offices and houses. Where the density of mobile phone masts is low however (e.g. in rural areas) the accuracy of LBS can be very poor. In general therefore LBS is a better solution than GPS but individual circumstances (e.g. utility workers in rural areas) may dictate GPS as a better solution. Once GPS enabled phones become more ubiquitous and the ability to remotely interrogate them becomes standard then this would be the ideal solution since GPS and LBS can be enabled on the same device therefore benefiting from the best of both solutions.

In the meantime the overriding question regarding the use of either system is the advantage over the alternatives. Either system will only tell you where the device is, not whether the loneworker is with the device. They also rely on the device being connected to the mobile network and not switched off. To ensure the efficacy of a totally integrated loneworker system, a backup system for when location can’t be established needs to be put in place. A procedure whereby the loneworker’s location can be inferred by appointments diary, preferable updated at regular intervals is the obvious answer.

If such a backup system is in place then the advantages of either GPS or LBS are minimal in most scenarios. In an ideal system the ability to automate this appointment log is the preferred solution.

War, famine, poverty, random acts of violence, and corporate greed are just a few of the most critical problems facing communities, companies, the country and the world today. And exactly who predominates in all leadership arenas? Of course, men. Women don’t make better leaders than men, they make different leaders. They’re not afraid to bring in people with more expertise when there’s something they don’t know. They work to build collaborations, rather than operate from a top down principle. And their well-honed emotional intelligence enables them to effectively influence others using the least muscle necessary.

For centuries women have held a wide array of leadership role - but they haven’t always been given credit for their accomplishments, nor have they been so bold as to call themselves leaders. Yet through nature and nurture they have honed the quintessential skills needed to make a difference in the workplace, the community, and the world. If ever there was a time in history that cried out for women’s leadership, that time has arrived. Women must make sure their voices are heard, they have a place at the table, and, regardless of the resistance they get, they help change the course of history.

Whether you lead a work team, a volunteer organization, or even just a project, here are 7 tips to help you step confidently and courageously into your leadership zone.

1. Articulate your leadership vision. Write down what you want people to say about you when you leave a room. Fill in the blank, “She’s a leader who ___________.” Be as specific as possible. Include what you want to do, how you want to do it and what people will get out of doing it with you. Then act in ways to make it a reality.

2. Be strategic. If it’s a problem you’re solving or a change in direction you want to undertake, develop your overarching strategy for addressing the challenge before diving in. Avoid the tendency to approach everything with a high sense of urgency or to jump to action before thinking through a situation. Strategy takes time.

3. Resist perfectionism. We’ve all heard the saying, “a woman has to work twice as hard to be considered half as good.” Don’t let it guide your actions. Thinking that you have to be perfect causes your strategic thinking and willingness to take risks to be constricted. The balance of strategic thinking and tactical implementation is by nature imperfect - and always a risk.

4. Get to the point. Women have the tendency to use more words when fewer would do. More words used always soften a message. Fewer words strengthen a message. Keep in mind the maxim, “short sounds confident.” Begin your communications with the one statement you would want others to remember if you had only enough time to say that. Rather than continue speaking ask, “Do you have any questions?” or “Have I made myself clear?”

5. Volunteer to make formal and informal presentations. If you want to become really good at influencing others, seize every opportunity to go outside your comfort zone and speak before large and small groups. Also consider joining Toastmasters International.

6. Solicit 360 degree feedback. Asking three simple questions will yield a wealth of information - usually about behaviors related to emotional intelligence: What do I do well that I should continue doing? What can I do more of to be even more effective? What can I do less of to be even more effective? As with any kind of feedback or survey, be prepared to take action.

7. Balance your natural leadership skills with new behaviors. Women are good at bringing out the best in people through coaching. Combine these with more direct and assertive communication, deliberate decision-making, and an increased understanding of the political landscape of your company culture and you’ll be the leader you were destined to become.

Over the years, online dating has risen among the ranks of meeting people. Men and women, old, young, divorced, single, or married are now searching for their soul mates through numerous online dating websites.

Admittedly, it is rather difficult to evaluate the people you are getting to know online as to whether they are sincere, insincere, or just basically know who they really are. However, it is also true that online dating sites provide people with opportunities to interact and meet diverse personalities. Online dating has become a way of meeting single men and women of your type. These are the websites that charge fees, whereas there are also websites that do not.

When a person posts his her profile, it signifies that the person is interested in meeting others. In return, they will most likely get answers from people who will view their profiles and see the information that the person has chosen to share. The fun begins when one or two people send messages requesting that they be contacted, and even more so if a lot of individuals send messages.

Handling all of these messages and people one at a time would present a good challenge. You may prefer to deny some of them immediately, but this is not consistent since you are posting your ad in order to meet possible people to date. There is also that great possibility that the people you meet initially online are not who they really are in real life. Remember to keep in mind that you will need to get to know this type of person and learn to know him or her better.

To help you understand that the Internet is a place where a mixture of online daters with varying personalities, comes together, here are some tips to help you perfect the art of handling different types of people on dating websites:

Check the type of website. More often than not, you will be able to tell the tendencies or inclinations of the members of the dating community based on the dating website itself. If at first you find sexy and/or obscene pictures of men and women on the front page itself, chances are that the dating website is not so strict with regards to its membership and rules. If the quality of the dating site is not that good, then there is a huge possibility that you will be able to come across some nice people as well as some insincere people.

Be honest with your intentions. When online dating, you will be able to meet a lot of people, i.e., single, educated, uneducated, those who want to play on others’ emotions, those who want to date for fun, those who are controlled, some with perverted minds, etc. Right off the bat, you should be clear with your intentions - no matter how crazy other people’s intentions may be. One of the cons of online dating is that you are limited with regards to your senses. As always, it is best to just be yourself and let your new contacts or acquaintances be themselves as well. If you do not like them, be sure to directly tell them how you feel.

Browse through the different profiles on the dating website where you are a member of. If you do profile browsing, you will be able to foresee the types of people you are most likely to meet. In doing so, you can run some background checks as to which countries they come from, what they like, and even how they write their profiles. This will give you the general idea of the culture and atmosphere of the website and its members.

While meeting a lot of people and finding the one you want to date is the goal. You should be aware that there are lots of types of personalities that move around the Internet. Certain precautions are necessary to make sure that you are not going to fall into the hands of predators, and at the same time refrain you from throwing away the opportunities of meeting the person you want to date. The tips shared above will enable you to stay away from unpleasant personalities in online dating websites. As what they say, the best offense is a good defense.